Monday Mindfulness

Cultivating Strength, Joy, Calm & Resilience


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Snowflakes Falling Like Grains of Sand

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As a child, falling snowflakes and snow-covered landscapes meant a break from the routine, a chance to play in a different way, no cars rushing by, no one in a hurry to get anywhere, a chance to sip cocoa and enjoy meals together as a family because no matter who you were surrounded by they became family in a snow storm.

At some point we “grow up”.  Snow becomes a nuisance, a hindrance from work, a blockade to accomplishing life.  The critical plans for what we believe is the great work of our life come to a screeching halt and everything is all messed up, or so it seems at the time.

For as long as I can remember, I have always been drawn to life at the beach – to live someplace warm, where folks saunter around in flip flops or squish their toes in the sand as they stroll the beaches in quiet reflection, where the pace of life is slower, where by nature time pauses so that you can notice simple surroundings, breathe a little deeper, and reflect more on thoughts and actions.

Life seems so much more in the moment at the beach and maybe that is why I am drawn to it — sparkling water lapping up on the shore, warm sand reminding me to press down through the souls of my feet and feel the earth.  Life seems to slow down to a gelatinous bubbling, like the colors floating in a lava lamp.

Oh, how different life at the beach is compared to the hustle and bustle of a big city — that is, until a big snow storm hits.  When the snow comes, it is as if Mother Nature is saying, “Come on folks, slow it down!”   Have you ever noticed how blankets of snow on hillsides are remarkably similar looking to dunes of sand?   The sensation of snow crunching under the boots creates that earthly connection with your feet.   Feel the snowflakes splash on your cheeks, like the surf curling up on your toes.

There is rarely a more peaceful and beautiful time than when snow is softly falling.  Everything slows down.   Branches stand in stillness as snow gathers at their edges.  Animals tuck into nooks in tree bases, napping all snuggled together.  Snow brings quiet reflection, contemplative movement, an invitation from Mother Nature to slow down, notice simple surroundings, breathe a little deeper, and reflect more on thoughts and actions.

So, the next time the snow begins to fall and seems to be getting in the way of the greatness you had planned for your day, perhaps it is simply an invitation to pause, go inside instead of outside, and allow a new greatness, perhaps your true greatness, to surface from within.

So whether it’s snow in your boots or sand in your toes, slowing down to notice it may bring the perfect opportunity to experience life a little more fully.

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Got my toes in the snow

                Hot cocoa tucked in my hand

                                Mother Nature says “slow down”

                                                Pretend the snow is like sand.

Take a moment…just relax…and get real.


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Play — Is it Really Just the Work of Children?

Yoga Play on Siesta Key

We all remember growing up.  The first time we twirled or rolled so much that laughter, interlaced with a smidgeon of fear, burst from within us as the world spun around uncontrollably and the mind tucked away a note to maybe spin a little less next time.  We sampled the roles of mommy or daddy, worker, leader, follower, and friend as we played dress up together or joined in team games on the playground.  We dropped objects from tables, stairwells, and out car windows with genuine awe as the mysteries of how these things worked unfolded before our very eyes.  We spontaneously erupted in play, as we naturally found new ways to move the body, new ways to see the world, new ways to feel connected with it all.

When children engage in play, they engage in an adventurous journey through the unknown.  Play allows you to take chances, to explore edges, to uncover workings of the physical body, subtleties in social and emotional dynamics, expressions of creativity, and to conduct investigations and form solutions through active problem solving.  Play is the foundation of learning.  Play is critical for growth.  Play is an essential element in the development of a bright, well-rounded, well-adjusted person.

Why then do we limit play to children?  Why, as they grow older, do we discourage children from going to this natural place of curiosity, wonder, and learning?  Why, when we become adults, does play disappear?

While there may be a question about whether you can form new neuron synapses or the brain can improve its functionality after a certain age, there is no question that play, at any age, provides an opportunity for exploration, sensation, and learning.

So, grab your neighbor’s hand and go run through that pile of leaves in the middle of the yard, or roll down that grassy hill, or scoop up some snow or sand and build with it. Dip your fingers in paint and slide them across an empty canvas.  Lie on your back, grab your feet and roll from side to side like a happy baby.  Smile, laugh, and dig deep down into your inner child and let it shine in the wonder, curiosity, and learning of play.

If you’re worried about what other folks may think as you get silly, serious, loud, or creative in your play, invite them to join in.  Free yourself and others from the misperception that there is no room in adulthood for play.  Engaging in play could be the best thing to keep you agile in mind, body, and spirit and ensure a lifetime full of curiosity, wonder, and awe.  Imagine what you might not discover, what you might not feel, what you might not learn, who you might not become if you never played.

Play is the work of children…and of healthy adults too.


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The Value of a Secure Oxygen Mask

oxygen mask

When flying with small children or those requiring special assistance, you notice right away that flight attendants suggest that in an emergency oxygen masks will dispatch from the cabin overhead and that you are supposed to secure your oxygen mask first before assisting others.

What? Help myself first and THEN others? Seems pretty selfish, down right rude, and certainly contrary to maintaining a generous spirit. Should I really tend to my needs first?

Whether raising children, caring for loved ones, supporting colleagues at work, or just moving through life, others are always relying on us. We are no good to anyone if we are running ourselves ragged, neglecting to care for ourselves, or giving until we are all tapped out. What if we engage in self-FILLED service instead of self-LESS service? What if we were to keep ourselves strong, healthy, vibrant and full, so that we can be there for those who need us when they need us most?

So, maybe that flight attendant was right. To best serve those in need, maybe I do need to put on my oxygen mask first.  Maybe I need to get my own oxygen flowing first before I can help others with theirs.

On your Boeing 737 lifecraft, don’t let the voice of that very wise flight attendant be drowned out by engine noise. Know the information on the safety card, and, whatever else you do, be sure to secure your oxygen mask before assisting others with theirs.

Give your seat belt a tug.

Give your neighbor a hug.

This Boeing is going.

We’ve been cleared to fly!

 


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Make It A Day

It should have taken 20 minutes, but instead I sat in traffic for an hour and a half, I spilled tea in my lap, and I had a headache.  Immediately, frustration bubbled up in me and I said, “Grrr, I’m having such a BAD day!”   Why????

Why is it rational thought encourages us to label everything, to justify experiences, to identify feelings, and define our world as “good” or “bad”?   Rational thought is a great gift, but it sometimes gets in the way.

The ego steps in to say, “this is hard work, it’s a big challenge, so to help you feel better, let’s call it bad”. (or maybe even use more expletive words)

What qualifies as a bad day…or a good day?  Does it change over time as new labels are affixed to experiences?  Can experiences be relabeled?  Why is it easier to label the bad before the good?  Why do we need labels?

Perhaps, instead of creating labels for the challenges, the hard work, the setbacks, the traumas, they could just be there…all just part of LIFE.

Would I really be loved less if people around me didn’t hear me complaining, if I told of my day without defining it?  Is the outcome truly different if I call a situation good or bad?  Or, can I simply move through the experience and see these challenges as adding to who I am, but not defining me or causing that roller-coaster of emotions.

The tea in my lap dried up.  Deep breaths alleviated my headache.  I arrived in time and my day went on.

I think I will work on not having so many good days or bad days, but just having more days.


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Move From a Place of Joy

Susan Kerr - Joy

When you do something…

…are you fully present?

…does it make the corners of your mouth crease upwards?

…does it make your belly tingle?

…does your spirit dance like a leaf on the wind?

…do others around want to jump in?

…can you feel their curiosity about this delightful state of you?

…do you feel the heat, the light of your true self shining?

…do your eyes sparkle?

Yes, yes, yes!!!!!  That is JOY!!!!!!!!!!!!

Let them in.  Teach them how.  Remind YOURSELF!

We need more JOY!

Sparkle…laugh…love…find that natural state of being —

and do it over and over and over again.


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Racing to Get Her Zen On

Racing      The door flung open, bells slashing loudly and abruptly against the wooden molding.  She raced in, tearing her coat off, kicking her shoes from her feet, keys dangling from her teeth.  Her breath was heavy, forehead glistening with sweat.  And, as the other students sat on their mats waiting for class to begin, she looked up through her tousled bangs and shouted, “I’m here to get my Zen on!”

Since when do we live in a world where we must turn our Zen on?  Why is it we need to make formal space in order for us to experience such a natural state?

What would happen if we no longer forced spaces in our day for “being in the moment” and instead each day naturally contained them — opportunities for breathing deeply and richly, moments of acute awareness of and engagement in our surroundings, and action from a place of compassion and kindness?  What if every day included time to play, to create, to enjoy our food and each other – not scheduled time, but naturally occurring moments in our day?  What if we could let go of goals and outcomes so that all of our actions could naturally lead to positive end results?

A few weeks ago, my mom greeted a work colleague with a question – “What are you doing tomorrow, on your day off?”  The friend paused and, after rendering a bit of a puzzled expression,  said, “I don’t have days on and days off…I just have days.”  He went on to explain that there is no difference in his experience of “work days” and “non-work days” as he treats every day as a gift and finds reward and ease in each day.

That is getting your Zen on!

Class ended.  She slowly stood up with a soft sparkle now in her eyes and a gentle smile in the corners of her mouth.  Her movement was easeful, her air calm and floaty – she was almost unrecognizable from the form we saw racing in the door just an hour before.  She stood back and let others move first through the doorway.  She asked one student about their health, another where they had been the prior week.  She had an awareness about her, an aura of wisdom, an unbridled confidence, without arrogance.

She had indeed gotten her Zen on and hopefully it will stay with her a little longer each time it happens until she arrives at that place where her Zen evenly flows throughout each and every day.

Until then, we’ll keep the light burning, the door open, and hold a space for her and all the others who are racing to get their Zen on.


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Enjoy the Ride

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Just the other day, I walked out of my house to find a praying mantis sitting on the hood of my car. I almost missed seeing him, his sleek self trying his best to blend in with the silver paint. I wondered why he chose to perch there. I wondered why I assumed it was a “he.” I wondered if he knew that I was on my way to teach a yoga class, and I couldn’t help but wonder if he was planning to come with me. So, I said, “You know I am getting ready to go and you might not like the breeze that comes with driving down the busy roads to the studio. You may want to hop down now.”

It didn’t seem to faze that praying mantis. It just sat there on my hood, even despite the gentle prod I gave it with my finger. So, I started the car and slowly backed down the driveway.

I paused the car a few times in the driveway to offer it a chance to jump down and choose another place to sit, but it didn’t budge in the least. In fact, as I put the car in drive and headed up the street, that little praying mantis simply spread its wings in the increasing breeze of our forward momentum. I rolled the window down at the next stop sign to once again encourage it to hop off as I knew we were soon leaving our snuggly little neighborhood. Could it hear me? Did it understand the imminent danger in heading out onto busier streets? It didn’t seem to care the way I thought it should.

So, we kept on going. As we reached 25 mph, its legs shook a bit and its wings ruffled along its back, but that praying mantis looked amazingly calm…happy (if I dare claim to know what a happy versus angry praying mantis looks like).

The road became more curvy and bustled with cars and trucks zooming past in the opposite direction. I was now up to 45 mph and I thought surely it couldn’t hold on, surely it would be scooped up in the wind and carried off into somebody’s grill. Oh, no. Now I was responsible for its fate!

Alas, we arrived at the studio. Can you believe that little guy was still there?! Just sitting on my hood as if nothing had happened. Me?  — I was wings ruffled, head spinning, utterly exhausted from the experience. That praying mantis remained perched contentedly on the hood of my car, apparently quite happy with the entire turn of events. I asked if this was its intended destination, as if it had somewhere to go and had it arrived on time. It just sat there, not so much as flinching as I bent over, just inches from its small, curious face.

Then, it occurred to me.

Perhaps this praying mantis really didn’t need a ride. Perhaps it really had nowhere to go. Perhaps that praying mantis was just there to remind me that the journey – the quivering in your legs, the wind in your wings — is your real purpose and arriving at your destination is secondary.

The praying mantis smiled…and as I walked off towards the studio, I was almost certain I heard him say, “WOW — what an awesome ride!”

Enjoy the ride!


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Mind The Gap

Image          Due to age and changing topography, the London subway trains (also known as the Tube) often arrive at their platform stations with a noticeable gap between the floor of the train and the platform edge.  With its arrival at each station, the train announces to passengers to Mind the Gap as they depart the train.

On the path of life, as in the London subway system, rarely is the pavement straight or level.  Often there are small, subtle changes in the alignment of the floor with the platform that might cause you to stumble, but with a little awareness and an adjustment to your step, you are on your way.  At other times, the step up or step down requires a lot more attention.  The gap is wider, requiring more strength, increased agility, and greater care as you navigate the divide…a tumble here could really set you back. 

Fortunately, a recorded voice reminds passengers on the Tube to be aware.  The voice is loud and distinct and hard to ignore.  In life, that voice is more subtle and comes from within – but it’s there!  Tuning in, increasing your awareness, and allowing that voice to guide you may be the difference between a serious tumble and smooth stepping.

Whether the path requires that you step up or your best move is to step down, whether the gap is huge or just a small crack, your approach to what lies ahead makes all the difference in whether you reach your destination successfully.

So, stay flexible, be aware, step up, or back down, know that the divides and uneven pavement along the way are just part of the topography…and you’ll be just fine, as long as you mind the gap.    

Safe travels!


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To start again

To start something takes bravery and courage, but the body and mind usually have at least a base level of security, a feeling of excitement, curiosity, and anticipation about the great things that could potentially come.

To start again, to pick up where you left off — to overcome defeat, loss, pain — takes something even deeper and stronger than bravery or courage.  It takes a faith, a deep down belief in yourself that you are going to be OK, even though you and often many of those around you cannot see, feel, or imagine that.  Yet somehow, you find it – first faith, then hope, then courage.  The fog slowly begins to clear, the heart softly open again, the colors of the Universe gradually return to their vibrancy – and your resiliency buffs the patina of your soul and makes you to shine once again.

In the words of my dear friend, Susan Kerr, painter, sculptor, writer, coach, inspiration to so many, “and hope found me and I was able to start again.”

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start again. 

i had loved for years

i had held and cherished

and when she became sick

i had doctored and fed and wished and prayed

i had taken her back and forth

forth and back 

to doctors

i had cried

i had hoped

i had seen her recover

and wished beyond reason

and then the day came 

when i had to decide

and i had to let her go

to move on into this world of something else

we can transition, sleep, heaven?

and i did and so it was

and my heart fell out of my chest onto the floor

and it stayed there for days and months

nights were the hardest

as every day she would stay with me

lay with me

invite me to tenderness

she would see me

and i would hold her

and we would be

LOVE

LOVE

LOVE

and my broken heart one morning

saw the sun again

and another day some days later

it felt the sun again

and days later still

i was able to smile and later laugh

and even later still lift my face to that sun of all things miraculous

and then later still i picked up my paints

and hope found me

and i was able to 

start again.

                                                      – Susan Kerr

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Click on “Inspiring Images” to view Susan’s painting entitled “start again.”To view more paintings and poems by Susan Kerr, visit her website:

http://www.susankerrinspiration.com