Monday Mindfulness

Cultivating Strength, Joy, Calm & Resilience

Tag Archives: loss


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Cradled in Grief

Johann Hari once said, “We grieve because we have loved. We grieve because the person we have lost mattered to us.”

Grief is not a linear process.

It is an ebb and flow of emotions

and choices that we navigate,

between holding on and letting go.

Like this water,

tears move,

ever changing in shape and patterns.

The flowers that bloom and subsequently fade away

help us find our way back

to a place in our hearts,

to remember

the beauty,

the joy,

and the love,

to soften for just a moment

the pain,

the aloneness,

the fear of having to live beyond this very moment.

Set it all down,

come into this moment.

Let it hold you.

Let it nurture you,

stroking your cheek,

embracing you with softness and sweetness.

For the next few moments,

let everything else go.

You are loved,

and held,

more than you will ever know.


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And so, we grieve

Take time to rest.

Time to feel.

And time to heal.

In this moment there is nothing more important than

the next breath.

Feel me sitting right there next to you,

in the center of your softly beating heart,

exchanging a wink and a smile, surrounded by light,

knowing that we have loved

and are loved so dearly.


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Courage

Let it all flow…

Hot and messy

like a volcano.

Root down and rise up,

Stop your feet,

Get low to the ground.

Burst with great force,

triumphantly,

unapologetically,

into the sky

Release the big

and scary

and frustrating.

Shake like a wet dog when you feel stuck or over burdened.

Curl inward and rest until you remember your power.

You are magnificent.

You

are

magnificent.


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Struck

The current flows through me like a lightening bolt.

Jaggedly it rips at my center.

The burning wake of hollowness almost crumbles me to the ground.

As the charge hits the earth,

it dissipates,

diffuses,

extinguished in a flash.

Breath and smoldering flesh hang on.

Roots cling to the soil,

unhinged by the destruction.

The sky still dark,

the air now still,

droplets descend from the clouds as a small peace offering and attempt to soothe.

Shhhh….

calls out the rain.

You will prevail.

Forever changed, yes.

Wearing the beautiful mark

of challenge overcome,

and your willingness to be a conduit

for the powerful energy of

change.


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Conviction

If our morals and beliefs suggest that we should all

love,

support,

and guide one another,

then wouldn’t true,

authentic

moral conviction

show up in the form of

grace

and forgiveness,

not shackles?

A calling back of the misguided to the embrace of

patience and gentleness,

not humiliation

and chastisement.

The invitation

to not be isolated,

but to come closer.

To take accountability.

To grieve in communion

for the loss

of others wounded by their actions

and

for their own internal suffering.

To wail in the arms of

a community

that shoulders mistakes,

missteps,

and misdeeds,

with understanding and humility,

no matter how egregious

on the surface.

To shed tears together to cleanse,

not punish,

embrace,

not discard,

teach,

not convict.


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Tidal Flow

Fresh water mixes with salt.

The gateway brackish,

murky,

churning.

Swimming against the angry currents of

struggle,

despair,

and loss.

Riding the tides with

flexibility

and fortitude,

trust

and patience.

Constantly changing conditions stir hope and determination.

Survival requires adaptability.

Leaving the familiar marshes of the small, quiet stream

to swim in the wide open playground of the ocean.

This choice

a devotion.

This river of tears

leads to an ocean of joy.


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Full court press

Curled up in a tiny ball,

breath pressing against muscles and bones heavy with the weight of not knowing.

The voice trying to find its footing,

wanting so desperately to be guided to its answers by the outside,

knowing it must dig deep and mine its own direction authentically from within.

In between each sigh,

a tear drops to the floor,

the only sign of motion

in this otherwise still

and down thrown body.

The simultaneous fullness

and emptiness

pulling at its core.

To be all

and

nothing.

Not afraid

to be afraid.


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Standing At The Gate

Loss and grief are proof that you have loved.

Love is the gateway to joy,

joy to peace.

You have loved and

known the essence of being loved.

Let the suffering move through you.

Rip yourself open with this grief.

Purify yourself with tears.

Beat your fists on the ground.

Pound your aching heart.

Take and give every punch with gratitude.

Shatter the barrier to feeling it all.

In the shallows of this darkness that accompany the pain,

Let every pain pour out.

Drop for a moment into the stillness,

this vast emptiness your refuge.

And, just as suddenly as the suffering began, a small space,

cleansed by your tears,

and broken open through your courage,

will begin to fill with sweetness, softness, kindness.

A slow, gradual unfolding will take place

as joy reveals itself

shyly,

purely,

authentically,

and more richly

than ever before,

because you have loved

and are willing to love and be loved again.


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Healing Salve

I hold your broken heart,

recognizing the worn and chipped pieces

of injury, loss, humiliation, and dejection

and the pains of long ago never repaired or attended to,

grown over with patchwork scars and gaping cracks and holes.

I am sorry for picking at and reopening those wounds.

I am sorry for creating new fissures and further weakening your heart’s integrity and your ability to feel whole.

I only ever meant to hold your heart gently and sweetly,

but at times my fear of losing it made me grip so hard

and cling so forcefully

that I only added to its brokenness.

I never lost sight of its beauty and worth.

I never lost touch with its essence.

But as I began to doubt the essence of my own heart, I chipped away at yours.

I only hope now to heal my heart

and send ripples of unconditional love across the void of brokenness,

applying a healing salve and restoring integrity.

With the deepest love of my heart, I render this prayer for forgiveness.


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Dear tears…

Dear Tears,

The pain is so intense, at times, taking the breath away.

Your arrival is a sign of hope,

and a forceful reminder to surrender.

You cleanse and clear the way for a new perspective.

Diving in so deeply and fully, consuming the moment,

you somehow soften the pain and bring breath back into the body.

This dance of flowing, heaving, melting, twisting and turning kneads the suffering into softness.

Every droplet contains an ocean of loving tenderness.

So beautifully pulling back the curtain,

allowing the light in,

transcending time,

washing out all bridges of reality,

exposing the space between,

bringing us home for healing.