Where the wind blows,
light dances
and shadows meander.
The trees sway and grass grows.
Raindrops fall.
The heart beats.
The body feels.
The mind rambles.
Quiet calls.
Stillness and movement reconcile.
This is where grace lives
and love persists.
Blustery cold takes my breath away.
Frozen, alone, confined to the space of myself.
Sharing my dreams with the walls, longing for the door to open.
Holding on to hope.
Awaiting that precious moment when fingers thaw and
hearts warm.
when the wind carries through the windows the fresh scent of renewal.
Expanding into the sun,
into my knowing
my power,
my love,
Into the garden of
wholeness
where I find myself
shedding the cold confinement,
ready to dance,
One day this single path abruptly split in two.
The potential in both directions was intriguing and alluring,
albeit a bit daunting.
The split itself brought much spaciousness and beauty,
a chance to pause and survey the widespread landscape of the past and present,
confirming there could be no wrong steps forward,
the divide simply an invitation to reawaken to this journey
and joyfully take the next step.
I am so powerful that I can command my own suffering to inform change.
I am so creative that I can find solutions to the underlying mysteries of my experiences.
I am so brave that I can step into my full consciousness and awareness with grace.
I am so smart that I can turn to love, kindness, and joy at any moment,
cultivating it within and inspiring it around me,
even in a world focused on being something else.
If our morals and beliefs suggest that we should all
love,
support,
and guide one another,
then wouldn’t true,
authentic
moral conviction
show up in the form of
grace
and forgiveness,
not shackles?
A calling back of the misguided to the embrace of
patience and gentleness,
not humiliation
and chastisement.
The invitation
to not be isolated,
but to come closer.
To take accountability.
To grieve in communion
for the loss
of others wounded by their actions
and
for their own internal suffering.
To wail in the arms of
a community
that shoulders mistakes,
missteps,
and misdeeds,
with understanding and humility,
no matter how egregious
on the surface.
To shed tears together to cleanse,
not punish,
embrace,
not discard,
teach,
not convict.
Curled up in a tiny ball,
breath pressing against muscles and bones heavy with the weight of not knowing.
The voice trying to find its footing,
wanting so desperately to be guided to its answers by the outside,
knowing it must dig deep and mine its own direction authentically from within.
In between each sigh,
a tear drops to the floor,
the only sign of motion
in this otherwise still
and down thrown body.
The simultaneous fullness
and emptiness
pulling at its core.
To be all
and
nothing.
Not afraid
to be afraid.
I can.
I will.
I am.
Because someone needs it.
My voice,
my intellect,
my pulchritude,
my courage,
my strength,
my kindness,
my grace,
deserve to be
seen,
heard,
felt,
held.
I will make a big, beautiful, bold, magnificent mark on the world…
Because I already have.
Flock to my greatness.
Celebrate me.
Show me pure,
authentic,
loyal,
sweet,
daring,
unconditional love,
the same way I am showing up for you in this world.
I fly out over the waves I call my home in search of nourishment.
In my seeking, I drift farther and farther from my nest.
Eventually, I am too tired to go on.
As I land, I find completely unfamiliar surroundings.
So unnerving, the experience of stepping out of the familiar, even when it’s for my own survival.
Do I retrace my steps and return to what was and where I came from, scavenging and settling for the scraps?
Do I settle into this new space and look ahead, embracing the unfamiliar and uncertain?
I can turn back or I can stand on these new shores.
I can forage and discover.
I pause and tuck under my wings where I find a consistent space of solace and reassurance,
to rest, to calm, and regain focus,
Here, I remember that to truly nourish myself,
I just may need to take flight and perch on new frontiers.
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In this moment,
I set down expectations and any sense that I am not already successful.
I am comfortable, confident, clear.
I replace striving with thriving.
I feel a flood of grace, ease, and acceptance.
Assuredness steps in to remind me that I don’t need to overcome.
I simply need to become.
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I hold your broken heart,
recognizing the worn and chipped pieces
of injury, loss, humiliation, and dejection
and the pains of long ago never repaired or attended to,
grown over with patchwork scars and gaping cracks and holes.
I am sorry for picking at and reopening those wounds.
I am sorry for creating new fissures and further weakening your heart’s integrity and your ability to feel whole.
I only ever meant to hold your heart gently and sweetly,
but at times my fear of losing it made me grip so hard
and cling so forcefully
that I only added to its brokenness.
I never lost sight of its beauty and worth.
I never lost touch with its essence.
But as I began to doubt the essence of my own heart, I chipped away at yours.
I only hope now to heal my heart
and send ripples of unconditional love across the void of brokenness,
applying a healing salve and restoring integrity.
With the deepest love of my heart, I render this prayer for forgiveness.
Monday Mindfulness 