
Crying to get in.
Clawing at the gap.
More urgency to break in than to break free.
Searching.
Pleading.
Prying.
Seeking.
Not every doorway mine to open.
Not every threshold mine to cross.

Crying to get in.
Clawing at the gap.
More urgency to break in than to break free.
Searching.
Pleading.
Prying.
Seeking.
Not every doorway mine to open.
Not every threshold mine to cross.

Where does it end,
the light from the sun
the light of the moon,
the dark of the shadows
the vastness of the sky,
cold of winter,
unfurling of spring?
Where is the line
that separates joy
from sorrow,
excitement
from fear?
What fills the space between earth and sky?
Is it my heart?
My body?
My breath?
In my mind I struggle
to find a separation,
an either or,
a division,
a moment,
where one exists without the other.
I cannot
and therefore
I cannot regret.
I cannot long.
I cannot judge,
right or wrong.
I cannot reject sorrow
or long for joy.
I cannot suffer in darkness or immerse myself fully in light.
I am made of it all.
It is all in me.
Or is none of it?
I am the space that fills
the space between.
I am the end of light,
the beginning of dark.
I am all of the joy and filled with sorrow.
I am the convergence of earth and sky.
I am the meeting place for it all.
I am the “and.”

I ask not that you change or conform.
You need not worry if who I am is not who you want me to be.
Let’s not need to hold hands in unity,
but hold hearts with respect.
I will not squash who I am,
or expect you to assimilate.
Even if I do not walk in your shoes, I offer you accompaniment,
so that we are both seen and heard and the rhythm and
harmony of our movement through life,
offers a flavorful contrast
for all the world to remember
the value of their own melody.

Tossing and turning
to release the entanglements,
the incomplete exchanges,
the charges,
the depletions,
the crossings,
taking from,
or rejecting
others
and self.
Battling in the darkness
the shame
and judgment
of the weaknesses,
mistakes,
and stuckness.
Playing the game
of loathing,
disaappintment,
protection,
defeat,
revenge,
in my sleep.
All the while knowing that whatever happened yesterday does not decide today.
No matter the outcome of the dreams or circumstances of before,
I will awake to a whole new tomorrow,
another opportunity to play.

Fortitude is born of persistence and patience….
The steadfastness to stay the course,
and acceptance as it all unfolds,
no matter how messy it gets.

When I peel away the stories,
When I release the plans I made,
When I drop into this very moment,
I see and feel so clearly
The peace,
The grace,
The love,
And the joy
At the core of my being.
I know this as the truth.
This mountain could not have been built of anything less.
This mountain I now climb provides the vantage point from which I launch into my unboundedness.

In her enormity,
unruliness,
and most unyielding state,
she is soft,
subtle,
clear in her direction,
ever capable of moving,
shifting,
adapting,
aligned,
attuned,
resonate,
in her power
and beauty.
We drink of her,
ride upon her crests,
sink cradled in her stillness,
follow her home,
allow her to absorb our burdens,
as we find peace by her side.
She reflects back to us always
what we need most to see.

In the space of silence and stillness,
there is an enormous void,
fabulous,
wide open,
freeing.
Or hollow,
isolating,
lonely?
It is one space.
In encountering this space,
there is a choice made instantly.
Inquiry,
assessment,
judgment
all rush in to
analyze,
identify,
interpret.
The recoiling in the stark emptiness is natural –
that moment when the stillness startles and unnerves as it presses against the constricting familiar.
And, each and every time,
that space can be met with
curiosity or fear,
acceptance or resistance.
It is the potentiality that resides in the peace of the heart.
It is a choice to receive it
as a gift
or a challenge
when feeling so fully
and completely
into ourselves.

The abundance of the universe surrounds me,
an endless supply of successes and challenges.
I always have the choice which way I turn.
Signs and signals.
Distractions and dilutions.
Stop looking to the outside for answers.
Trust the intuitive process of discernment and distinguishing.
There are no bad choices,
merely different ways to play in the field.
I can stay here or I can move towards something else.
Forcing narrows the focus,
and breeds striving,
limiting potential,
and resulting in tension and confusion.
Grace and patience fuel clarity
as trust flows into and from decisions to open opportunities,
not always challenge-free but solution-oriented.
Seeking the solutions
that inspire hope,
kindle kindness,
and support the expression of deepest passion
and purpose.
This is dharma.
This is the path of choice.

What would happen if I unleashed my wild self?
The parts of me that move freely, wisely, and instinctively.
If I tore off the garments of social norms and constraints that subconsciously influence my thought patterns and actions?
What if I could be in control and uninhibited?
Harness my passions and balance discipline with fearlessness.
Could I harmoniously exist between the light of rationality and the darkness where my wild, latent parts reside?
Can I embrace and express the dual aspects within me of passion and wisdom, freedom and structure, consciousness and instinct?
In honing my adaptability, I find the courage to assert the authenticity of my multifaceted self,
To roam freely yet wisely under the moon,
To unleash the inner beast and utilize knowledge and intuition to fully experience life,
and for life to fully experience me.