Monday Mindfulness

Cultivating Strength, Joy, Calm & Resilience


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Resentment

I didn’t listen to myself.

I didn’t present myself clearly.

My primary goal to avoid conflict,

I jeopardized my safety to ensure my survival.

And just like that I feel devalued.

My experience is in direct contrast with my values.

I chose inner conflict rather than anger.

Oh, I get angry, but I turn it all on me,

Suppressing outward expression out of fear,

For the sake of compliance.

Meeting the needs of others supplants

My capacity to meet my own needs.

Sacrificing my internal sense of security for connection

Causes an internal disconnection between my own heart and mind.

My body bristles at the assault and becomes a harbor for my anger

Disappointment surfaces as dis-ease and lingers

In my consciousness and beyond.

Suddenly, the sweet voice within that I so defiantly ignored

Grabs my full attention as it says,

“You did your best…

And they did too.”

“You are capable of keeping yourself safe now.

Be strong, consistent, and clear.

Make choices that preserve your freedom and safety.

Love yourself above all else

And you will never have to sacrifice your values for security.”

A new state of being immerges

Free of disappointment

Free of feeling wronged, hurt, and weak.

Free of resentment.

Free to be grateful.

Free to forgive.

Free of burdens

and unconditionally loved.


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Compass Rose

To the north I find the earth and sky.

The east brings new beginnings.

The west lowers the veil of transition, the mark of endings.

It is in the south where I meet my soul.

We sit and watch the rising and setting sun cast against the earth and sky over and over again.

Humbly and joyfully admiring the ever changing landscape of transitions, the beauty in the unknown as it takes shape each dawn and dusk, and the vast expanse of opportunity in between.


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Exploration

Is it a challenge…or a surprise?

Is it a set back…or an opportunity?

Is it a loss…or a lesson?

Is it feedback…or criticism?

Is it something worth exploring or a boundary that needs to be set?

All of my experiences are open to interpretation and I am free to make them whatever I choose.

There is plenty of room for suffering and pain, as well as creativity, joyfulness, and gratitude…

all there in every experience just waiting to be explored and to inform.


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Bursting with Power

It doesn’t matter how much power you have if you don’t allow it to burst out and serve you.

So many times I have used my power to suppress my own needs, my voice, my self-advocacy…all for the sake of “preserving the peace.” But, how can peace be preserved when a battle rages within me to suppress my own feelings and needs simply to avoid the risk of imploring you to revel in my power to know myself. Ah, yes, there is a chance that you will be wounded in the wake of my power, but that wound I can hold with much greater compassion than the devastation that comes from turning my power against myself.

My power transforms from exploding within to bright and shining rays of love and truth when authentically attuned. I begin to recognize that honesty is a demonstration of true prowess and the recognition of woundedness an opportunity to be powerful in kindness, forgiveness, and grace.

My power magnifies when I allow it to burst out and serve me, so much so that it can hold all of the discomfort, all of the woundedness, all of the needs and feelings — yours and mine – and in that outburst peace is preserved.


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Flowering Power

It’s a great gift we receive in every energetic exchange that we experience – the opportunity to…

absorb

utilize

diffuse

relegate

release

or give away

our power.

Feeling into your power or letting it go needs no special circumstances or conditions. It’s simply a choice.

Every time a choice…

Will I feel into my power

Or will I let it go?

Every time a choice.


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Living in the space of AND

White flowers

Dark textures

Straight lines

Soft edges

Living wholeness

Dried pieces

Flowing lines

Still emptiness

Warm touches

Cool feeling

Hope and breath

In the spaces

Photo courtesy of Susan Kerr.


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Sheer Connectedness

Sometimes I just don’t realize the sheerness of the stories I wear.

How they seem to protect me and at the same time be filled with holes.

I wear them to create a sense of separateness, of control, and the ability to shield myself from others.

I can never truly hide from that connection. A part of me will always remain exposed.

Perhaps a part of me pokes out beyond the edge hoping to be seen so that I can come out from under the stories.

When the veil of story is pulled back authentic, vulnerable, unfiltered connectedness can begin.


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Scattered

I wonder if our paths as humans are designed not to run in a straight line but to zigzag like the paths of butterflies in flight.

Zigzagging might not be an obstacle, but may just give greater freedom to go wherever we are inspired to go and break free from the predictable.

Perhaps the path is intentionally zigzag so that when we’re not sure where we are going, we end up exactly where we are supposed to be.


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Reasons

I can choose to encounter my world through friction and tension…

Or synchronized and harmonious.

There is feedback and purpose in both.

Tuning to aversion or alignment as the compass points on my path,

I can either move towards what feels comfortable, favorable, and right

Or rub up against imbalance, back up, turn away and go around.

I can always choose resistance or resonance.