I am so powerful that I can command my own suffering to inform change.
I am so creative that I can find solutions to the underlying mysteries of my experiences.
I am so brave that I can step into my full consciousness and awareness with grace.
I am so smart that I can turn to love, kindness, and joy at any moment,
cultivating it within and inspiring it around me,
even in a world focused on being something else.
In the space of silence and stillness,
there is an enormous void,
fabulous,
wide open,
freeing.
Or hollow,
isolating,
lonely?
It is one space.
In encountering this space,
there is a choice made instantly.
Inquiry,
assessment,
judgment
all rush in to
analyze,
identify,
interpret.
The recoiling in the stark emptiness is natural –
that moment when the stillness startles and unnerves as it presses against the constricting familiar.
And, each and every time,
that space can be met with
curiosity or fear,
acceptance or resistance.
It is the potentiality that resides in the peace of the heart.
It is a choice to receive it
as a gift
or a challenge
when feeling so fully
and completely
into ourselves.
Loss and grief are proof that you have loved.
Love is the gateway to joy,
joy to peace.
You have loved and
known the essence of being loved.
Let the suffering move through you.
Rip yourself open with this grief.
Purify yourself with tears.
Beat your fists on the ground.
Pound your aching heart.
Take and give every punch with gratitude.
Shatter the barrier to feeling it all.
In the shallows of this darkness that accompany the pain,
Let every pain pour out.
Drop for a moment into the stillness,
this vast emptiness your refuge.
And, just as suddenly as the suffering began, a small space,
cleansed by your tears,
and broken open through your courage,
will begin to fill with sweetness, softness, kindness.
A slow, gradual unfolding will take place
as joy reveals itself
shyly,
purely,
authentically,
and more richly
than ever before,
because you have loved
and are willing to love and be loved again.
I fly out over the waves I call my home in search of nourishment.
In my seeking, I drift farther and farther from my nest.
Eventually, I am too tired to go on.
As I land, I find completely unfamiliar surroundings.
So unnerving, the experience of stepping out of the familiar, even when it’s for my own survival.
Do I retrace my steps and return to what was and where I came from, scavenging and settling for the scraps?
Do I settle into this new space and look ahead, embracing the unfamiliar and uncertain?
I can turn back or I can stand on these new shores.
I can forage and discover.
I pause and tuck under my wings where I find a consistent space of solace and reassurance,
to rest, to calm, and regain focus,
Here, I remember that to truly nourish myself,
I just may need to take flight and perch on new frontiers.
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In between the mountains and valleys of thoughts,
Flows an inner resource deep within.
Its current runs through the deepest and darkest crevices of experience and rushes along the jagged and unpredictable surfaces of emotions.
It’s temperature, force, and direction make subtle shifts,
Navigating the terrain as it comes before it,
the inner resource remaining the constant in the ever-changing landscape.
It may from time to time be difficult to discern its presence, but with practice its presence becomes the familiar.
It’s consistent support and connection are unshakable.
All well being stems from and is fed by the inner resource.
The inner resource is the well of well being,
The inner resource is the taproot of our existence.
Can you feel it?
Dear Tears,
The pain is so intense, at times, taking the breath away.
Your arrival is a sign of hope,
and a forceful reminder to surrender.
You cleanse and clear the way for a new perspective.
Diving in so deeply and fully, consuming the moment,
you somehow soften the pain and bring breath back into the body.
This dance of flowing, heaving, melting, twisting and turning kneads the suffering into softness.
Every droplet contains an ocean of loving tenderness.
So beautifully pulling back the curtain,
allowing the light in,
transcending time,
washing out all bridges of reality,
exposing the space between,
bringing us home for healing.
There is not one giant awakening.
There is no detachment from pain.
There is not one moment of clarity that instantly falls upon the eyes or mind. There is not one instant one experiences freedom.
It happens bit by bit.
Awakening in the darkness,
in the suffering,
in the discomfort,
and in the dis-ease.
We begin to know it, like a dear and cherished friend.
There is a gradual unclogging, unfogging, and unraveling – that is the mystery of change.
That is the beauty of opening oneself to the potentiality of growing into something different.
Bit by bit, moment by moment, like pieces of a puzzle, thoughts and feeling, sensation and experiences, twist and turn and gradually find their way to fit together.
In that coming together, there is a sense of harmony and ease, perhaps even joy, that surfaces on the horizon,
not in overcoming the obstacles,
not in seeing the finished product,
but in feeling the creative process and drinking it all in.
Sometimes the light is too bright.
It is quick, and big, and so expansive.
Uncomfortable.
Unfamiliar.
Intimidating.
Too adventurous.
It feels great,
But a little unsafe.
Taking sips.
Feeling cautious.
Going slow.
Becoming curious.
Letting it tingle and flicker.
Allowing glimmers of ease.
Breathe by breath,
Becoming just a little lighter,
Peeling open with an achiness and stiffness,
Untangling and unfurling,
Nourished and relaxed by the light.
Beginning to awaken and transition.
Now softness and trust expand.
Permission granted to feel,
To release,
To become
Something else.
Freedom to be, anew.
I follow my breath to the small, tender space of my heart.
This is where I find security and assurance.
This is where in the quiet and stillness I hear the sweet voice of my Self.
I feel the very center point of my existence.
From this center, I am clear as to what I am and what I am not.
From this center, I am kind, courageous, creative, curious,
and, oh, so, very smart and strong.
From this center, there is enough of me to hold both of us joyfully in our play as humans.
From this center, bright light radiates out and all around me full of unconditional love that doesn’t just give and fix and please.
No, this bright, magnificent light protects, defines, and honors my deepest self which in return brings forward my best self for all of us.
Centered in my Self I know more clearly who I am, and who I am not, washing away fear and doubt, posturing and grasping, and external pressures to conform or contract.
Centered in my Self I experience peace and confidence, ease and joy, harmony and health.
I long to be Self centered.
Today I want to be a tree,
providing steadiness and sturdiness in the world,
receiving assuredness and ease,
knowing precisely where I stand.
Anchored in the strength of the earth.
Expanding gently, respectfully and gratefully into the air and space of others.
I want to be a source of clearing of thoughts,
feelings,
worries,
suffering,
not absorbing it as my own,
simply removing the impurities and toxins.
I want to breathe in and receive
the light
the water
the nourishment of family and friends
the success of work
the richness of creation.
to feel my beautiful roots and my capacity to grow endlessly upward and outward.
I embrace the simultaneously simple and complex nature of me
Inviting gratitude and joy as my guides
Growing ever stronger and steadier in who I am
and how I show up in the world.
Monday Mindfulness 