Monday Mindfulness

Cultivating Strength, Joy, Calm & Resilience


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Swimming

I came into this world knowing only me.

Somewhere along the way,

As I grew to know there were others,

I let them define who I came to be.

I thought I should follow.

And as a child, like a duckling, I did.

For that was my only sure source of food, shelter, survival.

But along the way, I noticed

I could forage, swim, and tuck my beak into my own wings

in a way unique to me.

It didn’t mean the others were wrong…

I just didn’t seem to be an exact fit to how they did these things.

I wrestled with knowing that I could make it on my own.

I convinced myself that I still needed to follow and be how and what they dictated.

And then one day, I gave it a small try.

I wandered a little farther away.

I showed up last to the waters edge.

I sat a bit longer in the sun than the rest.

There I found ease and a new sense of knowing.

The aloneness still haunts me from time to time as I am now no longer part of that brood.

And yes swimming on my own takes a new kind of effort.

But I’ve noticed

The others haven’t gone away.

Just their influence over my choices has.

Now we search for food near each other but don’t have to fight for the same piece.

We gather closer together when we need warmth and give space as needed.

We swim in the same waters but no longer in each other’s wake.

It’s a new way of existing,

This coming back to knowing me,

And it seems to be just the way it is supposed to be.


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Broken, and…

I came into this world far from perfect.

I came into this world, carrying a satchel of burdens, broken pieces, and suffering.

I came into this world to learn that whatever imperfections,

whatever brokenness,

whatever missing parts,

I am no less complete.

I am no less whole.

I am no less beautiful.

I am no less worthy.

I am no less valuable.

In fact, I am more striking,

more exceptional,

more capable,

more intriguing,

and more powerful,

as I embrace the contrast.

Unpacking the contents of the satchel,

I bravely weave together all the pieces with a thread of light and love that enjoys a lack of symmetry,

dances in the gaps,

Expands to fill the holes,

and revels in the spaces.

It is in the imperfections, the scars of journeys past, and the history that we carry,

That we remember the inner layers and the threads of who we truly are.


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Adulting

When I was a small child, I had needs.

My survival relied upon having my needs met by others.

I developed coping strategies to optimize the potential my needs would be met.

I had to believe I would survive. I was reliant on others.

As an adult, I can survive on my own.

I can need nothing.

My needs are now replaced with wants.

Wants are preferences that guide my choices and mold my experiences.

From the space of wants, I transition from believing I can survive to knowing I can thrive.

I move from engaging coping skills and relying on others to making choices in collaboration with those who authentically support my growth along with theirs.

There is power in wanting and knowing.

Wanting and knowing bring assuredness, clarity, and focus.

Expectations fall away, choices become simpler, and I begin to align more and more with my sense of fulfillment, harmony, and success.

Feeling the difference…

I need. I want.

I believe. I know.

I want.

I know.

I know.

I know.


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Dearest One

Don’t wait for them to see the richness and uniqueness – see it yourself…

Unwind your tangled perception of you…

Enjoy the where you are and the where you will be, each full of challenges and delights…

Please love yourself just a little more…you are harder on yourself than anyone else ever could be…

Do all things because they feel good and nurture you not because they are “right” or provide a shield from the deep dark thoughts and feelings that face you…

Fearlessly take the hands of hurt and pain and walk with them for a bit, let them guide you out of the darkness until together you find the space to release each other…

Take your time in the process of caring for you above all else…slow down and tend to each and every element of you as if massaging a baby tenderly with the balm of divine love…

Feel grateful for the ease and healing in every breathe…

Move your body with the joy and freedom it was designed for…

You, my friend, are made of love and all those with truest loving eyes will see that and that is all that matters…

Turn your truest loving eyes towards your own heart and hold it sweetly, love it dearly, and this will be enough.

Photo compliments of Pauline Campbell.


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Living in the space of AND

White flowers

Dark textures

Straight lines

Soft edges

Living wholeness

Dried pieces

Flowing lines

Still emptiness

Warm touches

Cool feeling

Hope and breath

In the spaces

Photo courtesy of Susan Kerr.


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Reflections

How often I stand in this being of me, just not sure what I see.

Insecurity on the inside

Appears as rejection on the outside.

Longing for love and positive connections

Show up as judgment and disappointment from others.

Feelings of shame and inadequacy

Manifest as attacks of anger and disgust.

The stories build not on what is really surrounding me but in the distorted view I have of the reflections.

My experiences and relationships are like a hall of mirrors.

The distortion produces more distortion until the internal and external judgment and criticism becomes too great to bear.

And then, I let go of the differences, weaknesses, faults.

I soften the gaze.

I let the edges of everything blur.

And then I see it is all just me.

I become curious not about what I see in the endless reflections in the mirrors, but in the source of the projection.


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Reasons

I can choose to encounter my world through friction and tension…

Or synchronized and harmonious.

There is feedback and purpose in both.

Tuning to aversion or alignment as the compass points on my path,

I can either move towards what feels comfortable, favorable, and right

Or rub up against imbalance, back up, turn away and go around.

I can always choose resistance or resonance.


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Wide Open

Hope you stay open today to all the world out there has to offer you.

There are no wrong choices…even if you choose to be the object of pain or discomfort for yourself or someone else. There is a lesson in it all… a forward momentum.

Sense when to watch and when to leap. Don’t be afraid to feel – all of it. Know that it is all there for you to experiment with and none of it bigger than you…because it is there as a part of you.

Seek adventure curiously and joyfully…in your heart, in your mind, and in every action or inaction. Take on all that is out there in whatever way will grow and inspire you best.

Lift the blinds. Open the window.

Breathe it all in.

Now go live in it.


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Powerfully chill

Oh, to be in a state of body and mind in which I am

wholly connected to my inner radiance,

my vitality,

my strength,

my wholeness,

my joy,

in such an unconditional way that I interact with the world

with such grace, vibrancy, and connection

that I glow and flow

in all that I am.

Soft and focused,

Clear and free,

Confident and humble,

Knowing and speaking universal truth,

that I am

Powerfully chill.


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Showing up

I am experimenting more and more with loving myself these days…not being safe or shoring up relationships to develop a sense of connection but authentic appreciation for who and where I am. I am showing up in the knowing that I have my intuition (that I will call Self) as a guide and while connection with community is an important element of the human experience, connection with my Self is just as crucial.

As I am learning to love myself, I am maneuvering through the awkward balance between selfish and selfless to find the sustainable space between…where ego informs, intuition guides, and I hold onto no preconceptions of what that will look and feel like as I determine what best serves.

The chain that secured the familiar is rattling. Full of insecurities, yours and mine, it informs as I release its grip on my heart, rusty links untangling for all of us to see that freedom is possible.

As I am rattling the chain around my heart I ask that you consider letting your chain rattle too to make room for a new way of showing up for you and for me.

Either way, I will be free but it might be more fun to conspire in the unchaining together.